Friday, October 2, 2015

Grandma Estelle's Chickens

Grandma Estelle's Chickens

Uncle Bud and Uncle Jessie were two of the best moonshiners in Johnston County. Unfortunately, they did their own 'taste testing' and most of the time the revenuers were a tad smarter than they were. So we only saw them occasionally. They drove the same old rusty Studebaker truck all the time and most of the fenders were just a memory. Each wheel wanted to go in a different direction and I believe they were the inventors of 'straight pipes'. You could hear them coming from away off And they thought that if they put a layer of straw over the 'shine' in the back of that truck it would be pretty well hidden.
One afternoon in August they were out to the house paying their respects to Grandma Estelle, and Bo Beasley came running into the house yelling that the revenuers were sneaking up through the cornfield. Course it won't true. (That boy always did have a mean streak). Anyway, Uncles Bud and Jessie took off through the cotton patch and dumped the corn likker into the spring on the way. In just a few seconds they were bouncing down the Old Stage road heading for Beaufort County.
The livestock would drink out of that spring and in just a short while every chicken on the place was laying as stiff as a poker and dead to the world. Grandma Estelle cried awhile and then put us to work plucking chickens. We plucked chickens up till time to go to the 'camp meeting' and gospel sing at the Shilo Hard Rock Baptist Church. We left the chickens laying in a pile and figured to finish them up by lantern light later that night. We all had a rousing time and sometime later I will tell you a little about some of the religions we have down here.
When we got back to the house later that evening all of the chickens were gone. We figured that the 'no account' Hutch family who lived just up the holler had taken them. Kilgore Hutch was about the worst of the lot. The next morning, at sunrise, we were awakened by a rooster crowing. They jest won't no way. That rooster had been laying dead with the other chickens last night. When we got to the back porch and looked, the back yard was full of bald chickens that we had plucked. Grandma finally figured out what Uncles Bud and Jessie had done and that the chickens hadn’t been dead at all, but just passed out drunk.
Bob Gurkin (posted by Brother Rick)

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